More adult children are taking care of their elderly parents due to the rising costs of healthcare and caregiving shortages. According to a study, the number of family members regularly assisting older adults with daily activities at home grew from 18.1 million to 24.1 million from 2011 to 2022.
Family members typically spend more than 30 hours per week assisting their loved one with personal care tasks, as well as daily activities such as food preparation and laundry. Those who take on most of the caregiving tasks are women, with daughters providing more hours of care than sons. This is why the majority of female caregivers report experiencing chronic stress, which could lead to poor health outcomes later on.
Siblings must share caregiving responsibilities to keep elderly loved ones healthy, provide consistent and reliable support, prevent burnout, and ensure emotional and financial balance. No single child should bear this enormous task alone, and even those who live far away from their elderly parents should do their part, as caregiving can be more effective if it’s approached as a team. Here’s how siblings can share caregiving responsibilities, prevent conflict, and create a more nurturing environment for their aging parents.
Create a Realistic Caregiving Plan
Some adult children take their aging parents to a nursing home or a residential care facility if they’re not equipped to provide constant care. Institutional care can be a viable option, especially if your elderly parent requires specialized care due to a medical or cognitive condition. However, staffing shortages and a lack of trained personnel in most care homes may put your loved one at risk of neglect, which can lead to increased falls, malnutrition, and choking incidents after being fed inappropriate food, among others. This can lead to worsened conditions, unaddressed health impacts, and even death.
To avoid health and safety risks, consider creating a caregiving plan that allows you and your siblings to give your elderly parent focused attention and financial support while they age in place. Have a meeting to discuss your parents’ needs and what each one of you can realistically contribute. Don’t forget to include siblings who live far away from home and have them join the meeting through a video call.
List all tasks such as household chores, daily care like bathing and feeding, driving to doctor appointments, and keeping track of expenses. Next, assign tasks by matching each one to a family member’s skills, geographical location, and availability. For instance, those who live nearby can cook meals, assist with personal care, and buy medicine, while family members who live far away can handle tasks that can be done remotely, such as paying bills, managing healthcare insurance, locating services, and the like.
Take Care of Finances
If your aging parent needs help to cover the costs of their medications, food, and other expenses, think about asking your siblings to make monetary contributions for your parent’s care. Present clear, specific costs of each expense so they know how much is needed, then ask what they can contribute. Be flexible, and don’t demand that everyone should give the same amount. Keep in mind that your siblings have different situations, and some may be able to give more than others. If money is tight for some of your loved ones, ask if they can cover smaller expenses, such as Internet costs, or if they can take on tasks such as cooking meals to save on takeout or delivery expenses.
Have a Plan in Case of Life or Work Events
A study has found that about a quarter of all adult child caregivers are caring for a minor child, and most of them are also employed. This means that while they’re making things work to the best of their abilities, they’ve also stretched themselves too thin as they barely have the time, money, or energy to accomplish everything that needs to be done. Eventually, they’ll have to take a short break from caregiving, as there will come a time when they’ll be busy with work, or they’ll be required to go on a business trip or attend a school-related activity.
If this is you and you’re the primary caregiver, you’ll need to have a plan so you can attend to your other responsibilities. Think about hiring a professional caregiver to look after your parent so that they’re cared for even while you’re busy with other matters. Let your siblings know about your plan and find out if they can chip in to cover the caregiver’s fee. Be sure to let them know about your situation so they can understand why you need to get help from someone outside the family.
It takes a village to ensure the health and well-being of an aging parent. Consider these tips to effectively share caregiving responsibilities with your siblings and be sure to keep communication lines open to address any concerns before they escalate.
This article was written for WHN by Bri Burton, who is a talented wordsmith, an avid blogger, and a health advocate.
As with anything you read on the internet, this article on caregiving should not be construed as medical advice; please talk to your doctor or primary care provider before changing your wellness routine. WHN neither agrees nor disagrees with any of the materials posted. This article is not intended to provide a medical diagnosis, recommendation, treatment, or endorsement.
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